{"id":615,"date":"2020-12-25T20:00:22","date_gmt":"2020-12-25T19:00:22","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/cekirdekgunluk.com\/?p=615"},"modified":"2020-12-25T20:00:22","modified_gmt":"2020-12-25T19:00:22","slug":"anne3","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/cekirdekgunluk.com\/?p=615","title":{"rendered":"anne3"},"content":{"rendered":"\n<figure class=\"wp-block-image size-large\"><img loading=\"lazy\" width=\"1024\" height=\"1024\" src=\"http:\/\/cekirdekgunluk.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2020\/12\/post32.1-1024x1024.jpg\" alt=\"\" class=\"wp-image-616\" srcset=\"https:\/\/cekirdekgunluk.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2020\/12\/post32.1-1024x1024.jpg 1024w, https:\/\/cekirdekgunluk.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2020\/12\/post32.1-300x300.jpg 300w, https:\/\/cekirdekgunluk.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2020\/12\/post32.1-150x150.jpg 150w, https:\/\/cekirdekgunluk.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2020\/12\/post32.1-768x768.jpg 768w, https:\/\/cekirdekgunluk.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2020\/12\/post32.1-620x620.jpg 620w, https:\/\/cekirdekgunluk.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2020\/12\/post32.1.jpg 1080w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 1024px) 100vw, 1024px\" \/><\/figure>\n\n\n\n<figure class=\"wp-block-image size-large\"><img loading=\"lazy\" width=\"1024\" height=\"1024\" src=\"http:\/\/cekirdekgunluk.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2020\/12\/post32.2-1024x1024.jpg\" alt=\"\" class=\"wp-image-617\" srcset=\"https:\/\/cekirdekgunluk.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2020\/12\/post32.2-1024x1024.jpg 1024w, https:\/\/cekirdekgunluk.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2020\/12\/post32.2-300x300.jpg 300w, https:\/\/cekirdekgunluk.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2020\/12\/post32.2-150x150.jpg 150w, https:\/\/cekirdekgunluk.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2020\/12\/post32.2-768x768.jpg 768w, https:\/\/cekirdekgunluk.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2020\/12\/post32.2-620x620.jpg 620w, https:\/\/cekirdekgunluk.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2020\/12\/post32.2.jpg 1080w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 1024px) 100vw, 1024px\" \/><\/figure>\n\n\n\n<p>Annelerin \u00e7ocuklar\u0131na kar\u015f\u0131 ara ara nefret de duymas\u0131n\u0131n ne kadar normal oldu\u011fundan bahseden ve bunu \u00e7ekinmeden dile getiren, anlamaya \u00e7al\u0131\u015fan Winnicott \u015funlar\u0131n da alt\u0131n\u0131 \u00e7iziyor:<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>&#8220;\u00c7ocuklar\u0131n\u0131 seven ve di\u011fer duygular\u0131na bakmaktan korkmayan annelerden s\u00f6z etti\u011fimi siz de anlayacaks\u0131n\u0131z. Mesela bir bebek tam olarak annenin hayalinde tasarlad\u0131\u011f\u0131, zihnindeki bebek fikrine denk d\u00fc\u015fen bebek olmayabilir. \u2026 \u015e\u00fcphesiz ger\u00e7ek bebek sihirle ortaya \u00e7\u0131kmaz. Bu ger\u00e7ek k\u0131z ya da o\u011flan, annenin hem hamilelik boyunca hem de do\u011fum s\u0131ras\u0131nda risk alt\u0131nda oldu\u011fu zahmetli bir s\u00fcrecin sonunda d\u00fcnyaya gelmi\u015ftir. \u015eimdi anneye ait olan bu ger\u00e7ek bebek, beslenme s\u00fcreci \u00e7ok tatmin edici olsa bile, emerken annenin can\u0131n\u0131 ac\u0131t\u0131r. Yava\u015f yava\u015f anne, bebe\u011fin kendisini bedava bir hizmet\u00e7i gibi kulland\u0131\u011f\u0131n\u0131, dikkat bekledi\u011fini ve ba\u015flang\u0131\u00e7ta annenin rahat\u0131yla hi\u00e7 de ilgilenmedi\u011fini ke\u015ffeder. Er ge\u00e7 bebek anneyi \u0131s\u0131r\u0131r. Ba\u015flang\u0131\u00e7ta annenin bu bebe\u011fi tam kalbiyle sevmesi beklenir ve buna i\u015fin zevkli k\u0131s\u0131mlar\u0131 kadar ho\u015fa gitmeyen k\u0131s\u0131mlar\u0131 da dahildir. K\u0131sa bir s\u00fcre sonra bebe\u011fin anneyle ilgili ya\u015fad\u0131\u011f\u0131 yan\u0131lsama bozulmaya ba\u015flar. Bebek bunu, ona sunulan iyi yeme\u011fi reddederek g\u00f6sterir ve anne kendisinden \u015f\u00fcphe duyar. Bebe\u011fin co\u015fkulu sevgisi \u00e7\u0131karc\u0131 bir sevgidir, tatmin sa\u011fland\u0131ktan sonra anne s\u0131k\u0131lm\u0131\u015f limon gibi f\u0131rlat\u0131l\u0131p at\u0131l\u0131r. San\u0131r\u0131m bir annenin kendi bebe\u011finden nefret etmesine yol a\u00e7abilecek sebepleri saymaya devam etmeme gerek yok.&#8221; (sf. 58)<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>Bu bir paragrafta derinlikli \u00e7ok fazla konu var: Hayalde, zihinde tasarlanan bebek var, ger\u00e7ek bebe\u011fin ondan ne kadar farkl\u0131 olabildi\u011fi var, anne-bebek aras\u0131ndaki etkile\u015fimin yo\u011funlu\u011fu var, annenin bebe\u011fin g\u00f6z\u00fcndeki konumu ile bebe\u011fin annenin g\u00f6z\u00fcndeki konumu var, d\u0131\u015f d\u00fcnyan\u0131n beklentileri var, annenin beklentileri var, bebe\u011fin beklentileri var, \u00e7ift tarafl\u0131 yan\u0131lsamalar var, bu yan\u0131lsamalar\u0131n bozulmas\u0131 var. Herhalde en \u00f6nemlisi de, bu konularla da ba\u011flant\u0131l\u0131 olan, anne ile bebe\u011fin birbirlerine kar\u015f\u0131 hissedebildikleri ve hissedilmesi \u00e7ok normal olmas\u0131na ra\u011fmen kabul edilmesi \u00e7ok zor olan nefret duygusu.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<pre class=\"wp-block-preformatted\">Foto\u011fraf, Erwin Doorn, <a rel=\"noreferrer noopener\" href=\"http:\/\/www.unsplash.com\" data-type=\"URL\" data-id=\"www.unsplash.com\" target=\"_blank\">Unsplash<\/a>.<\/pre>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>Annelerin \u00e7ocuklar\u0131na kar\u015f\u0131 ara ara nefret de duymas\u0131n\u0131n ne kadar normal oldu\u011fundan bahseden ve bunu \u00e7ekinmeden dile getiren, anlamaya \u00e7al\u0131\u015fan Winnicott \u015funlar\u0131n da alt\u0131n\u0131 \u00e7iziyor: &#8220;\u00c7ocuklar\u0131n\u0131 seven ve di\u011fer duygular\u0131na bakmaktan korkmayan annelerden s\u00f6z etti\u011fimi siz de anlayacaks\u0131n\u0131z. Mesela bir bebek tam olarak annenin hayalinde tasarlad\u0131\u011f\u0131, zihnindeki bebek fikrine denk d\u00fc\u015fen bebek olmayabilir. \u2026 \u015e\u00fcphesiz [&hellip;]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":618,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":[],"categories":[14],"tags":[],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/cekirdekgunluk.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/615"}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/cekirdekgunluk.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/cekirdekgunluk.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/cekirdekgunluk.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/cekirdekgunluk.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=615"}],"version-history":[{"count":1,"href":"https:\/\/cekirdekgunluk.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/615\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":619,"href":"https:\/\/cekirdekgunluk.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/615\/revisions\/619"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/cekirdekgunluk.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/media\/618"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/cekirdekgunluk.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=615"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/cekirdekgunluk.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=615"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/cekirdekgunluk.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=615"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}